How to support a child on the anniversary of the full-scale invasion

25/ 02/ 2025

February 24 is a day that forever changed the lives of Ukrainians and brought immense pain, which still echoes in the hearts of millions, especially children who have lost one or both parents due to the war. The anniversary of the invasion may trigger mixed emotions in children: sadness, sorrow, anger, or even fear. These feelings are a natural response to loss and traumatic experiences. Marta Bilyk, the psychologist of the Children of Heroes Charity Fund, explains how we can help a child get through this day? Allow them to experience their emotions naturally. Some children may want to share their memories, while others may prefer not to talk about their loss. It is important to give them space and not force them to speak if they’re not ready. If the child asks questions, it is best to respond honestly. Preserve the happy memories. Symbolic acts can help a child feel connected to their fallen parent: lighting a candle, writing a letter, or drawing a picture. This is important because the memory of loved ones can become not only a source of pain but also an inner strength that will support the child throughout their life. Be there for them. Even if it’s hard to find the right words, your physical presence and support are more important than any conversation. Sometimes a hug (with the child’s consent), a kind word, or simply silent presence gives the child a sense of safety and reassurance that they are not alone. Support kids during commemorative events. If the child wants to participate in the events, it is important to explain to him or her what exactly will happen and support him or her at this point. If they feel uncomfortable or do not want to participate, their choice should be respected. It is worth remembering that events dedicated to honoring the memory of fallen defenders are a challenge for all participants. The task of adults in such a situation is not to close themselves off emotionally from the child, to be there for him/her and to create a safe space where the child can experience his/her emotions without fear or judgment.

The anniversary of the invasion may trigger mixed emotions in children: sadness, sorrow, anger, or even fear. These feelings are a natural response to loss and traumatic experiences.

Marta Bilyk, the psychologist of the Children of Heroes Charity Fund, explains how we can help a child get through this day?

Allow them to experience their emotions naturally. Some children may want to share their memories, while others may prefer not to talk about their loss. It is important to give them space and not force them to speak if they’re not ready. If the child asks questions, it is best to respond honestly.
Preserve the happy memories. Symbolic acts can help a child feel connected to their fallen parent: lighting a candle, writing a letter, or drawing a picture. This is important because the memory of loved ones can become not only a source of pain but also an inner strength that will support the child throughout their life.
Be there for them. Even if it’s hard to find the right words, your physical presence and support are more important than any conversation. Sometimes a hug (with the child’s consent), a kind word, or simply silent presence gives the child a sense of safety and reassurance that they are not alone.
Support kids during commemorative events. If the child wants to participate in the events, it is important to explain to him or her what exactly will happen and support him or her at this point. If they feel uncomfortable or do not want to participate, their choice should be respected.

It is worth remembering that events dedicated to honoring the memory of fallen defenders are a challenge for all participants. The task of adults in such a situation is not to close themselves off emotionally from the child, to be there for him/her and to create a safe space where the child can experience his/her emotions without fear or judgment.